May 30, 2005
The World in Seven Pictures
PG-Rated
Only in China:
Please Unsubscribe Me From This List
G-Rated
This was posted by the frustrated moderator of a Yahoo Groups list after a subscriber had taken up several days of list space asking for directions on how to unsubscribe which s/he was apparently unable to comprehend...
"If this is truly a plea to be unsubscribed you should know that there's a very simple, if not inexpensive, way to do so.
See the rest of "Please Unsubscribe Me From This List"Alaskan Street Gang
G-Rated
Watch out for these characters...
See the rest of "Alaskan Street Gang"Ready for a padded room?
G-Rated
It doesn't hurt to take a hard look at yourself from time to time.
This little test should get you started.
See the rest of "Ready for a padded room?"Who's the Boss
X-Rated
See the rest of "Who's the Boss"May 22, 2005
Bathroom Art
G-Rated
Imagine you had a little to much to drink, having a good time, suddenly you need to use the restroom!!
See the rest of "Bathroom Art"May 21, 2005
Darn Dog
PG-Rated
A woman goes to her boyfriends' parents' house for Easter dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family, and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
See the rest of "Darn Dog"May 19, 2005
YOU KNOW YOU WORK AT A LAW FIRM WHEN...
G-Rated
[Forwarded by a paralegal who say's it's all too true....]
You know you work at a law firm when...
1. Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
2. It's dark when you drive home from work.
See the rest of "YOU KNOW YOU WORK AT A LAW FIRM WHEN..."May 17, 2005
Church bulletin bloopers
PG-Rated
These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:
* Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
See the rest of "Church bulletin bloopers"May 15, 2005
True Doctor Stories
PG-Rated
A man comes into the ER and yells,
"My wife's going to
have her baby in the
cab!" I grabbed my stuff,
rushed out to the cab,
lifted the lady's dress,
and began to take off her
underwear. Suddenly I
noticed that there were
several cabs, and I was
in the wrong one.
--Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX
May 13, 2005
Tsunami Survivor
PG-Rated
Haggard and dehydrated survivors of Asia's tsunami catastrophe are found floating in the ocean as far out as 100 miles! Pictured here is a woman who managed to survive without any debris or flotation devices for days. How she managed is still baffling officials.
See the rest of "Tsunami Survivor"May 12, 2005
The Sisters of St. Francis
PG-Rated
A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the co rner of his eye. It reads:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCISSee the rest of "The Sisters of St. Francis"
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES
May 11, 2005
The Begining of the End
G-Rated
Cardinals Use Electronic Voting Machines to Elect New
Pope
George W. Bush Elected Pope ... Cardinals Stunned!
Reported by Monsignor Guido Sarducci
The almost 120 Cardinals from around the world that gathered to choose a successor in the Vatican's Sistine Chapel were stunned and expressed amazement.
See the rest of "The Begining of the End"May 10, 2005
Home for Dinner
PG-Rated
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead?"
See the rest of "Home for Dinner"May 08, 2005
50 Years
PG-Rated
A man and his wife were about to celebrate 50 years together. Their three kids, all very successful and wealthy agreed to a Sunday dinner in honor of their parents. As usual, they were all late and had a varied assortment of excuses.
See the rest of "50 Years"May 02, 2005
Bubba and the Yankee
G-Rated
Bubba applied for an engineering position at a refinery in Baton Rogue, Louisiana. A Yankee applied for the same job, and as both applicants had the same qualifications they were asked to take a test by the manager.
Upon completion of the test, both men only missed one of the questions.
See the rest of "Bubba and the Yankee"School Notes
G-Rated
Supposedly real notes written from parents in a Mississippi School District. (Spelling has been left intact.)
My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
See the rest of "School Notes"May 01, 2005
The Four Cats!
PG-Rated
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer,
the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist, and<
the fourth man was a Government Employee.