Word Play

Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are the 2003 winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating "The bozone Layer." Unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high..

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it..

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late..

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness..

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.).

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer..

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you..

13. Glibido: All talk and no action..

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly..

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web..

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out..

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating..

And the pick of the literature:.

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.