Health Food

Chocolate is good for you.

Chocolate is made from cocoa beans, and beans are vegetables. It contains sugar, which comes from either sugar cane or sugar beets, which are both plants. Therefore, chocolate is a vegetable. If you eat chocolate-covered cherries, raisins, strawberries and orange slices, you're getting fruit in your diet. Chocolate-covered nuts are in the protein food group. And since chocolate contains milk, it is a dairy food.

To have a balanced diet, eat equal amounts of dark and white chocolate.

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite, and you'll eat less of the foods that don't taste as good.

If the chocolate melts on your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Beauty tip: Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

Time management tip: Write "Eat chocolate" at the top of your daily "To Do List." That way, you'll get at least one thing done.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Think of the energy you could save.

Help protect the American economy. If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. You can't let that happen, can you?

If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer.  But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

Money talks. Chocolate sings. Beautifully.