Here are a few things that you can do at your local Wal-Mart while the
wife or husband is taking hers or his sweet time shopping.
- Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when
they aren't looking.
- Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5 minute
intervals.
- Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
- Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "Code 3 in
electronics," . . .and see what happens.
- Go to the service desk and ask to put a bag of M & M's on layaway..
- Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
- Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll
only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
- When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask "Why can't
you people just leave me alone?"
- While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows
where the antidepressants are.
- Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from
"Mission Impossible"
- In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size
funnels.
- Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through say "PICK ME!
PICK ME!!!!!!"
- When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal
position and scream "NO! NO! its those voices again"
.... and last but not least ....
- 14. Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly. "Hey! We're out of
toilet paper in here!"
Now ... happy shopping!
