October 31, 2011

Priceless: The Dress [PIC]

PG-Rated

Formal Dress: $200

Dinner and Drinks Before the Dance: $80

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October 30, 2011

Explanation of Earthquakes for the Layman [PICS]

PG-Rated

Recently, Christchurch and Japan had terrible earthquakes with lots of after shocks. Some were thought to be oscillatory, while others were believed to be trepidatory. It occurred to me that most people might be confused about this, so I thought it wise to let everyone know the difference.

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October 29, 2011

Life's Little Crossroads [PIC]

R-Rated

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October 19, 2011

If...

G-Rated

If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with you troubles,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

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October 18, 2011

Your Job?

G-Rated

Sven and Ole worked together and both were laid off, so off they went to the employment office. When asked about his occupation, Ole said, "Panty Stitcher. I sew the elastic onto cotton panties." The clerk looked up 'panty stitcher'. Finding it classed as unskilled labor, she gave him $300 per week unemployment pay.

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October 17, 2011

Tanlines [PIC]

PG-Rated

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October 16, 2011

Plumber's Ad [PIC]

G-Rated

[I give this guy massive points for creativity. But I am concerned about traffic accidents ...]

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October 15, 2011

Smoking [PIC]

R-Rated

There is no way the Greeks will be able to control their economy and meet the terms of the bailout by the EEC and the IMF.

They can't even enforce the No Smoking regulations!

A Greek law has banned smoking in eateries since 7/1/09.

Look closely at how many cigarettes are in the ashtray on the right in this photo, taken at a Greek restaurant ...

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October 14, 2011

Death of a penguin

G-Rated

I never knew this.

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica - where do they go?

Wonder no more!!!

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life.

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October 13, 2011

The Political Flowchart

PG-Rated

When top level guys look down,

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October 12, 2011

How to serve chicken wings to a man [PICS]

PG-Rated

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October 11, 2011

The High Tech Bar

G-Rated

A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"

The man thought a moment then replied? "A martini please."

The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.

The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?" The man answered "Oh, about 164."

The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity, inter-stellar space travel, the latest medical breakthroughs, etc...

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October 10, 2011

Unclear on the concept [PIC]

R-Rated

October 9, 2011

You must be this tall... [PIC]

R-Rated

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October 8, 2011

And how was your Day? [PICS]

G-Rated

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October 6, 2011

The Fairy...

G-Rated

A Fairy told a married couple, "For being such an exemplary married couple for 35 years, I will give you each a wish".

"I want to travel around the world with my dearest husband" said the wife. And the fairy moved her magic stick and abracadabra! Two tickets appeared in her hands.

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October 5, 2011

Follow the clues...

PG-Rated

It's a detective story so pay attention, you have to solve it.

Three elderly ladies are excited about their first Mariners baseball game. They smuggle a bottle of Jack Daniels into the game. The game is real exciting and they are enjoying the game and drinking Jack Daniels mixed in their soft drinks.

Soon they realize that the bottle of Jack Daniels is almost gone and the game has a lot of innings to go.

Using the clues given, what inning is the game in and what is the status of the game?

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October 4, 2011

Grandpa

PG-Rated

A young man came walking up to his grandparent's house when he noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch, in a rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down.

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